To Build a Home, by The Cinematic Orchestra.

No Wonder I'm Not Friends with Cute Boys.

Me:	(Walking to class) ...
Cute Boy 1:	Then what?
Cute Boy 2:	She just started giving me head!
Cute Boy 1:	Excellent!
Me:	(Walking to class, disillusioned) ...

Destiny?

Me:	Weird that I'm learning stuff YOU teach.
Dad:	It is probably all back there in your brain.
Dad:	I used to practice my lecture when you lay in your crib.
Me:	It's like you were trying tog et me to be a biochemist straight from Mom's belly.
Dad:	Right.
Dad:	A plot.

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[Jen, this happened because of you.] I just realized that my family never owned a polaroid camera. I feel like I’ve missed out.

Winter Break Accomplishments.

1) Sleep/eat.
2) Watch Beauty and the Beast.
3) Sleep/eat.
4) Learn how to tie a tie.
5) Sleep/eat.
6) Watch Mulan.
7) Sleep/eat.

This is probably unhealthy.

A Dedication to Jen.

I would like to dedicate an entire post to my neighbor, Jen Wang.

If we fail college, I would like everyone to know that I will be opening a massage parlor with Jen (as her faithful apprentice, of course).

Jen Wang, you are a wonderful person. You must share your talent with the world.

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I live on oatmeal. Literally.

Britney Spears.

Is it a bad thing that I like her new album?

The Things You Learn in College.

Wednesday was a very enlightening day.

I decided to take a bathroom break between anthropology and Japanese, so I came back to the dorm and made my way into the first bathroom stall. There was a toilet seat cover already there, as if someone changed their mind about taking a toosy (as Val would say) and left it there for me to enjoy. Either way, I noticed that, for nineteen years, I’ve been putting the toilet seat covers on backwards. You’d think it wouldn’t really make a difference, but it actually does. The paper slowly slides into the bowl if you put it on the wrong way, making it a challenge to unzip and plunk your butt on the toilet seat cover before it slips into a soaky oblivion.

So next time you use the bathroom, make sure to put the toilet seat cover on the right way, or you’ll be thinking Ready, set, go! too.

Some Wise Words.

Something every college student wants to hear:

“Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is a nobler art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of nonessentials.” - Lin Yutang.

Is chem a nonessential? …If only.